Do you know anyone like this? Someone who has a vehement opinion on everything but when push comes to shove they are not willing to take any action personally? They like to stir up drama and garner attention for themselves but are not willing to pick up the pieces of the mess they caused. Instead they run away stating there is too much drama for them. They always look like the angel.
So often people feel the need to be the center of attention because their self-esteem is really low. They create drama where there is none so they stay the center of attention longer. They inject themselves into situations that they are not a part of and, though it may not be intentional, harm those who are involved. They want others to feel their personal pain so they create a tornado of accusations, exaggerations, and “poor me’s.” Then once everything and everyone is at a rolling boil, they throw their hands up and evacuate because the drama has become even too much for them.
I have a few of these people in my life. For the longest time, I would get angry and frustrated with them. I would yell and scream and tell them what I thought of them. But then I would play right into their own game. Moreover, their negative energy would permeate my entire person and I would ooze it into the rest of my life for a few days afterwards.
Now I choose to keep a distance from them. I stand back and let them wreak their havoc, but I work around them. I don’t allow their actions to anger me as much (though I am human and there are still times when they can truly get my goat). I also do not allow myself to stoop to their level and talk badly about them behind their back.
Instead I truly just feel sorry for them. Oftentimes their pain has gone so deep and the people around them feed it so much that they do not even realize the true damage they are causing. They have fallen for their own lies so deeply that they feel their actions are justified. I feel their pain and hope for healing for them. I have left the door open if they ever want someone to talk to, but I do not let them infect me any longer.
I also take all of my interactions with these people as a true reminder. A reminder that we all have selfish tendencies inside of us. That we all crave attention and want our voices heard. A reminder to always keep my motives front and center in my own mind and make sure my actions and choice do not intentionally hurt anyone. A reminder that I have to have trustworthy people around me who will call me on anything that may be leaning to a direction I do not want to go in. It is vital to have a group of confidants who have their own opinions ad who are not just “yes men” with their own agendas.
We are all humans. We are all the same. We are just trying to make our way in this beautiful world and leave our mark on it. The only way we can do that is coming together. We are an amazing, beautiful, and powerful race. It is time we stop throwing accusations and start throwing admiration. If we are going to take our world to the next level, we must stop our petty complaints and arguments and see ourselves as the brethren we are.
Live Life,
Bert Oliva